I got to thinking about love triangles. I adore love triangles. I am fascinated by them. I love to write them; I love to read them; I love to watch them. This is not to say that I would want to be involved in a love triangle. However, my fascination for love triangles is reflected in my stories. The novel I’m currently writing, tentatively titled, The Sophie Shelton Chronicles, tells a story of a college coed conflicted between her feelings for two different guys. And it’s been amazing to write. There’s a sense of understanding when it comes to love triangles. We choose a side. We have to root for someone. And that’s exciting. But the most exciting part is writing the character that chooses, explaining why she chooses this person. We cannot always explain what our heart says. But love triangles can explain this common question.

I found this article on Yahoo! the other day. Apparently I’m not the only one fascinated with love triangles…

http://movies.yahoo.com/photos/movie-love-triangles-slideshow/

I got to thinking about pity. Why do we feel sorry for ourselves? Why do we insist others grieve with us? And if they don’t, we think the world is against us. But it isn’t. How can we overcome this? Will we overcome this?

I won’t lead you on; I’m one of these people. When my beloved grandfather died two years ago, I was grieving alone. The friends around me at the time didn’t ask about it, they didn’t show me that they were there for me. And that broke my heart. I wanted them to grieve with me; I wanted them to feel sorry for my loss. But you know what? I shouldn’t have asked for so much. Yes, they should’ve been there more; but how could they possibly grieve over something foreign to them? Once I learned this, I realized that grief is personal. However, being a good friend means dropping everything; it means doing everything to help the process of grief.

I got to thinking about chivalry. Why doesn’t the male youth of America know this? Were they simply not taught this? It baffles me that males my age talk about derogatory things in front of women, don’t open doors, don’t stand up when a woman comes to a table, and don’t pull chairs out. I’m not saying I’m a feminist—far from it—but there’s a certain expectation boys should learn from an early age. Chivalry hasn’t died, but it certainly is on a break. Let’s bring it back. To every young male in America: be chivalrous, respectful. This will impress any woman. Plus, you’ll get points in my book.

I got to thinking about appreciation. How much do we really appreciate each other? Do we always say ‘thank you?’ Do we always make sure our friends and family know just how much we need and love them? I think there’s a definite lack of appreciation in this world. We don’t always acknowledge that chivalrous man who opens the door for us; we don’t always tell our mothers and fathers how excellent their cooking is. And that’s a shame. We should acknowledge each other more. We should show our appreciation every day. This is to my mother, for her wonderful meals she makes every time I’m home. And for my father, who makes the best tacos in the world. I love you two! You’re amazing and I appreciate you abundantly.

I got to thinking about religion. At what point do we consider ourselves to be religious? Is merely believing in God, in heaven enough to be called religious? Sometimes I wish I were more religious than I am. I fully believe in God and pray most nights, but I don’t seem to make it to mass very often. And that’s a shame. I think religion is an amazing outlet because it gives us something bigger than ourselves to believe in. We think higher, believe higher, and know that there is life for us after death. Thus, death becomes a less intimidating element we all must face if we know God is waiting for us at the end of the road. How do I know this? It’s simple. I believe. And that makes everything in life much easier for me. I have someone always watching over me, protecting me. Religion makes me realize that I’m not alone. And that’s really all I could ever ask for.

I got to thinking about self-reliance. There’s a certain point when we all have to grow up and begin to rely on ourselves. But when is that point? And when do we reach the point where others will have to rely on us? Henry Ford once said, “Chop your own wood and it will warm you twice.” I’ve always found myself to be independent. I don’t rely on anyone else for most things. But I’ve found that as I’ve gotten older, it’s okay to rely on others for some things. Being fiercely independent is a quality most people yearn for, but sometimes we have to ask for help. We cannot do everything ourselves. Do what you can on your own, but ask for help when need be.

I got to thinking about forgiveness. Again. I think about this a lot. Maybe because it’s so difficult for me to forgive. And you know what? I’m only human. Why is it so much easier for us to forgive a stranger than someone we love? Why do we accept apologies from that moron who hit our car, but not from our friends and family?

I believe this: it’s much easier to push away someone you’ve gotten close to, someone you shared your soul with, someone who may know your deepest, darkest secrets. We push away those we love because we’re vulnerable. We don’t want to feel this vulnerability. But I’ve learned that we must forgive these people. These are the people who love us, who seek our forgiveness. That must mean something. So do this: if someone you love breaks your heart, trust, or something tangible that cannot be replaced, learn to forgive. It’s much easier than being bitter. It’s much more gratifying than holding a grudge. And at the end of the day, if you have forgiven someone, you have done something spectacular. Keep those who love you close. Forgive.

I got to thinking about green. It’s my favorite color, after all. Isn’t it obvious by the color scheme of my blog? I recently stumbled across an article that described what our favorite colors mean about us. For instance, since I love green, I am sympathetic and fiercely loyal. I can definitely stand behind the loyal part… I will be your friend ‘til the end if you so choose. But I wouldn’t call myself sympathetic. It’s a good quality… just not one of mine. Green lovers also don’t take crap. I’d say that’s true. And finally, green lovers are generally humble, even though they’re amazing at what they do best. Are you a green lover? Does this describe you? It’s funny to me that my favorite color does, indeed, describe some of my qualities.

I got to thinking about success. When do we achieve success? Is it after we get what we want? Is it getting a dream job? Or is there more to success that merely getting what you want? I define success as setting out to do something and completing it, whether or not you get what you want. Success is determination. Success is not results; it’s completion of a desired goal. So if you complete a goal, whether or not you get results, you are successful. Sometimes we don’t get what we want. And that’s okay. As long as we tried to get what we want, that’s when we know that we are truly successful. There’s no failure in success. We did what we could, and that, at the end of the day, is more than enough.

I got to thinking about high aspirations. We set short-term and long-term goals every day. We aspire to be more than we are. But we must also realize that our goals aren’t always in reach instantly; that shouldn’t stop us from believing and dreaming. There’s this quote by Louisa May Alcott that I love: “Far away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow them.” So do this: follow your heart, set your aspirations high. You never know when you’re going to reach them, but you can always follow them. Someday, those dreams will come true if you follow them long enough. Never give up on your goals, no matter how out of reach they may seem sometimes.