I got to thinking about religion. At what point do we consider ourselves to be religious? Is merely believing in God, in heaven enough to be called religious? Sometimes I wish I were more religious than I am. I fully believe in God and pray most nights, but I don’t seem to make it to mass very often. And that’s a shame. I think religion is an amazing outlet because it gives us something bigger than ourselves to believe in. We think higher, believe higher, and know that there is life for us after death. Thus, death becomes a less intimidating element we all must face if we know God is waiting for us at the end of the road. How do I know this? It’s simple. I believe. And that makes everything in life much easier for me. I have someone always watching over me, protecting me. Religion makes me realize that I’m not alone. And that’s really all I could ever ask for.

I got to thinking about self-reliance. There’s a certain point when we all have to grow up and begin to rely on ourselves. But when is that point? And when do we reach the point where others will have to rely on us? Henry Ford once said, “Chop your own wood and it will warm you twice.” I’ve always found myself to be independent. I don’t rely on anyone else for most things. But I’ve found that as I’ve gotten older, it’s okay to rely on others for some things. Being fiercely independent is a quality most people yearn for, but sometimes we have to ask for help. We cannot do everything ourselves. Do what you can on your own, but ask for help when need be.

I got to thinking about forgiveness. Again. I think about this a lot. Maybe because it’s so difficult for me to forgive. And you know what? I’m only human. Why is it so much easier for us to forgive a stranger than someone we love? Why do we accept apologies from that moron who hit our car, but not from our friends and family?

I believe this: it’s much easier to push away someone you’ve gotten close to, someone you shared your soul with, someone who may know your deepest, darkest secrets. We push away those we love because we’re vulnerable. We don’t want to feel this vulnerability. But I’ve learned that we must forgive these people. These are the people who love us, who seek our forgiveness. That must mean something. So do this: if someone you love breaks your heart, trust, or something tangible that cannot be replaced, learn to forgive. It’s much easier than being bitter. It’s much more gratifying than holding a grudge. And at the end of the day, if you have forgiven someone, you have done something spectacular. Keep those who love you close. Forgive.

I got to thinking about green. It’s my favorite color, after all. Isn’t it obvious by the color scheme of my blog? I recently stumbled across an article that described what our favorite colors mean about us. For instance, since I love green, I am sympathetic and fiercely loyal. I can definitely stand behind the loyal part… I will be your friend ‘til the end if you so choose. But I wouldn’t call myself sympathetic. It’s a good quality… just not one of mine. Green lovers also don’t take crap. I’d say that’s true. And finally, green lovers are generally humble, even though they’re amazing at what they do best. Are you a green lover? Does this describe you? It’s funny to me that my favorite color does, indeed, describe some of my qualities.

I got to thinking about success. When do we achieve success? Is it after we get what we want? Is it getting a dream job? Or is there more to success that merely getting what you want? I define success as setting out to do something and completing it, whether or not you get what you want. Success is determination. Success is not results; it’s completion of a desired goal. So if you complete a goal, whether or not you get results, you are successful. Sometimes we don’t get what we want. And that’s okay. As long as we tried to get what we want, that’s when we know that we are truly successful. There’s no failure in success. We did what we could, and that, at the end of the day, is more than enough.

I got to thinking about high aspirations. We set short-term and long-term goals every day. We aspire to be more than we are. But we must also realize that our goals aren’t always in reach instantly; that shouldn’t stop us from believing and dreaming. There’s this quote by Louisa May Alcott that I love: “Far away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow them.” So do this: follow your heart, set your aspirations high. You never know when you’re going to reach them, but you can always follow them. Someday, those dreams will come true if you follow them long enough. Never give up on your goals, no matter how out of reach they may seem sometimes.

I got to thinking about karma. What goes around comes around, right? If we do the right thing, will we be led to better things? That doesn’t always seem to be the case. Just because we’re the victim sometimes doesn’t mean we’ll experience justice. Even if we act accordingly, karma doesn’t always seem to act in our favor. Why is this? Shouldn’t we have good karma if we do the right thing the majority of the time? Honestly, I find this to be completely unfair. And I know, I know: life isn’t fair. But sometimes, it should be. What goes around should come around. I’ve been baffled by this lately. Hopefully, someday, I will understand why things turn out the way they do. And that’s simply all I need. Karma will come around.

I got to thinking about true happiness. What exactly does it mean to be happy? Does it mean you get everything you ask for? Does it mean wealth and stability? Does it mean true love and family? I don’t really think you can put a general definition on the word happy. Everyone defines happiness differently. We spend so much effort trying to make ourselves happy. We eat at fancy restaurants, buy the pair of shoes we have been eyeing for months, and force ourselves into situations we think will make us feel better. So the question I ask myself is: what do I define as happy? Is that what I feel? Usually I’ll say yes to my definition of happiness, and that is all I can ask for. That is all any of us can ask for.

I got to thinking about the mind of a writer. It’s a crazy thing, you know. Writers, for the most part, are generally quieter types. Writers are too busy noticing things and watching people to make conversations. After all, the best writing comes from things we know, things we notice. Most people just see what’s in front of them. Writers don’t. Writers analyze, over-analyze, explore the possibilities. And that whole thing about creative people being tortured? It’s true. Writers are tortured. Writers get out their aggression and angst simply in writing. We don’t hit punching bags, we don’t pick fights, we write about those things that make us hurt or hostile. Am I tortured? Of course; I’m a writer. And you know what? That’s what makes for the best stories. So I’m okay with that.

I got to thinking about consideration. What does it take to be considerate? How do we know if we’re being considerate? At what point do we put the needs of others above our own? I find consideration to be a simple matter of understanding. When someone asks you not to do something that annoys them, you don’t do it anymore. But why is this not such a simple concept to most people? Where do we learn to be considerate? Is this innate? Or this consideration something we learn from our parents?

However we learn the basic principles of consideration, we must remember that it isn’t all about us. That would be much easier, but it wouldn’t be a learning process. We cannot always put our needs first. When practicing consideration, remember that someone else may need something greater than you; remember to be understanding. After all, understanding is all consideration really takes. Well, that, and an awareness of other people.  If you’re considerate, the favor will be returned.